I have been wanting to write about Aari since before he was born. But life was busy. School, research, groceries, chores around the house, nursing Aari, sleepless nights…there was no space to think. Things are different now. I am a stay-at-home mom for the next few months. Aari and I get a lot of time together…and there’s a lot of time to think, and I often do think about the two of us- Aari and his Mamma and what a happy little duo they make.
It’s been only 2 months, but him staying away from daycare and with me all day has been wonderful for us. I see him grow up everyday. I understand what he’s trying to say…and he doesn’t talk yet. I know when he’s hungry and when he wants to sleep. I know that he has a sense of humor and an angry streak. He loves music and we dance together everyday. I make up silly stories and he patiently sits and listens to them, and chuckles merrily when they’re done. We read books, paint and eat yummy food. We go to the museum, to the park and out shopping. We hug and he gives me slobbery kisses on my cheek.
However, there are times when I’m tired and I really want a break. I need to take a long shower, or just go away by myself for a few hours. I am glad for the time I get in the evenings and on weekends when Chandu’s around. It’s important for my general sanity. But when I’m away too long, I miss him. I miss my baby. I miss his smell and his touch, and his toothy smile.
Back in Bombay, there’s a sculpture on a busy highway…with a mother and child and it says, “A child gives birth to a mother.” And that truly has been the case with me. I love children and I couldn’t wait to have my own, but I didn’t feel very motherly at first when Aari was born. It was new territory…sweet but unfamiliar. Yet, slowly but surely here I am. I am Aari’s mother, his mamma and loving every minute of it.